Days like these

I wrote this blog months ago, and never got around to posting it. Life has a funny way of letting things fall through the cracks So I'm going to break the blogging rules, and i'm going to post something that i wrote a good two months ago. Fall is right around the corner, the other part of the year that i find completely perfect, so i feel like this is fitting:

The fourth of July is my favorite holiday, by a long shot. It's silly really, but something about this time of year is just so hopeful.. Even bittersweet sometimes. The rodeo comes to town, and just about every person I've ever known shows up. The carnival, the street dance, the parade, fireworks, barbecues, family, friends. I just love it. Today was the Rodeo, the carnival, and the street dance.

It's really nothing to do with what we do. The rodeo is basically the same every year. We sit in the bleachers that feel like they should have fallen down a decade ago, watch the cowboys chase down the baby cows and rope em' up. My mom cheers as loud as she can, every year, for the baby cows to get away. And somehow, most all of them do. Then when that's all over we walk around the carnival, we never really ride anything, it's so small, but we get a corn dog (the one corn dog i eat a year) and wander. Then we head over the street dance, watch the drunken people dance, listen to the band, wish we had the guts to be those two people in the center of the dance floor having the best night of just about everyone there, and we just take it all it. It's more to do with the feeling of it all.

Somehow this time of year makes me remember everything I've ever dreamed of. All the silly things. The things i would normally brush aside as something less important, they all suddenly come to life, and seem so important. Like some cheesy country song. Falling in love, living my dream, dancing the night away without a worry, with everything in the world to look forward to. That's how it feels. Like something is pulling on my heart, trying to bring back to life the parts of it that feel so ridiculously 'girly' sometimes.

I've decided to embrace it. The girlishness, and the love of the little things. I've been finding inspiration on the moments like that. Taking the time to listen to those feelings that i think are so silly most of the time. I heard someone say once, 'If money, fear, time, or resources, weren't a factor in your decision making, what would you be doing right now?' I've been thinking a lot about that one..And you know what? I think, with all of those things taken into account, if i could be doing anything, it would be simple. My first thought is that i would be laying under some sort of beautiful homemade canopy, made of a warm floral pattern, Hanging over a great big comfy bed, with feather blankets and pillows, with a fancy tea set, just drinking tea, maybe reading a book, or spending time with someone i love. I wonder why it is that those moments are the ones that i tend to strive the most for in life, and experience the fewest of..? Maybe because striving is very rarely, if ever, the answer to all of lifes little questions.

I feel like it should be easier to know when it's time to say yes to things, and when to let them go. But I'm learning that the process really is worth it all. How cliche is that? Maybe i'm okay with that...Who decided that cliche was a bad thing anyway, hmm? Anyways, Blog friends, the point is, if there really even is one, is that i've decided to stop striving for those moments. Putting them in a box, and only letting them come out when i feel like the surroundings deserve to be graced by their presence. Life doesn't happen like that. I've always been so concerned with not letting myself live in a box, that i didn't even realize i was putting so many other things into one. So, i'm burning the box, and trying out the vulnerable thing for a little while. I'll keep you posted on that :]

From my Blogland to yours,
Sweet dreams cyberspace.
CarissaDearest

Blog post two. Finally getting around to it.

You know how some days, all the motivation in the world is right there at your disposal? That feeling that if you wanted to conquer the world, master quantum physics, fly off with a mad man in a blue box, or maybe, just maybe, work up the nerve to follow that secret dream of yours that no one knows about because it just seems so silly, you might just be able to do it? Today was not that day. 

I didn't conquer the world today, master any skills, run off with The Doctor in his Tardis, or unleash my secret well of dreams. I did, however, manage to work up the nerve to work on this blog. Easier said than done really. I've made up my mind that what i want to do is to be a travelling blogger. A million adventures along the way, all somehow cataloged into the organized chaos that is my mind.

Sometimes i feel like my mind is a giant room filled with rows and rows of files and books, like the library in 'Beauty and the Beast' that every little girl fantasizes about. At least, i know i did. I think perhaps, somewhere in that library of mine is some ancient, scatterbrained librarian, frantically running around, pulling out files and books and papers and tossing them all over the place, making every unrelated memory or dream that's filed in there brush up against each other, bringing back some forgotten part of me that i hadn't realized i still had. It's a nice way to think i suppose. Just a bit busy. every thought delicately threaded through a timeline of random facts, dreams, memories, and imagination. It seems like a decent way to start blogging anyways.

Does anyone else's mind work that way? Or am i alone in that particular facet of crazy?

Anyways, the conclusion I've made is that my world is meant to be wonderful, and it is, but there are such adventures to be had! I'm starting with an adventure to Alaska. I'll keep you posted.

I wrote in my first post, that this blog would be a jumble of creative adventures, experiments, random thoughts and ideas, and that's what i'm going for. So, this is experiment number one. Finding the adventure in every day, and cataloging it in this blog of mine. It's simple, really, but like i said, it's not one of those conquering the world kind of days.

So, with jumbled thoughts and random rants, 

Until tomorrow! 

Adventures here i come.

CarissaDearest

New Chapter

Hello cyperspace.

It's strange to think of writing a blog, and putting it out there to float around in the space that is the world wide web, with no idea of who will read it, or if it will ever be read...Reminds me of a movie i liked as a kid..I can't remember what it's called, but a little girl pretty much hijacks an unused satellite and sends all of her thought's and fears and excitements right into outer space. I'm pretty sure it was called Sky Trackers...You know, Feature films for families? The absolute only 'grown up' movies i was aloud to watch until i graduated from the single digit ages...But even then...Who doesn't love a lovely inspirational movie with a pretty predictable plot and slightly mediocre acting? Noobody.

So if i end up as some wildly successful blogger someday, This is my version of a hijacked satellite, so, here's to you feature films for families, here's to you.

I'd like to think my random thoughts, DIY projects, Tutorials, and general rants about the world and all the things i love about it will be just a little more substantial than the pre pubescent satellite stealer in a classicly cheesy inspirational flick, but at the end of the day, i stinkin loved that movie.

So here i am blog world! All of you current zero followers! Prepare to be introduced to a blog of many moods and many different sides. Creative experiments, Project adventures, Ideas, Theories, failed experiments, and every now and again a poetic or witty gem tossed into the mix.

Here we go.

CarissaDearest